Does Time Heal All? Dealing with Difficult Emotions

Wellness

You may have heard the saying “time will heal all” but is it true? There are going to be many times in our lives when our problems are out of our hands and all we can do is wait. Time may not fully heal all our emotional scars but can soothe them. Before time can take its course to do its part in healing, you need to deal with your emotions and emotional harm.

Facing the issues

Any part of dealing with emotions is facing them, you cannot get over something unless you have dealt with them head-on. You cannot move forward if you are taking steps back and still being in denial of your emotions. Learn to register what it is that’s got you this way and how it’s made you get to where you are. Getting out of denial is the hardest step of getting over something, whether this is trauma or heartbreak you need to face the reality of your emotions.

Time cannot take its course unless you let it. Begin to step out of your mind for a minute and do some exercise like writing down what you're trying to get over, how it’s making you feel and ways you're going to get over it. Denial can make us seem out of touch with reality, daydreaming about the what-ifs and maybes. You cannot healthily move on if you haven’t accepted it.

Vent it out

Letting your thoughts out either verbally or by writing them down can be beneficial to dealing with them. Find a close friend or family member and vent to them if you feel comfortable enough to do so. Get some perspective from them on how you're feeling and let it all out. Don’t feel ashamed to have a good cry while you're at it’s healthier to get it out than keeping it bottled up. If you don’t feel comfortable having a verbal vent, get some paper or even your notes app on your phone or computer and start writing away. If you can, try to have frequent discussions or writing sessions where you continue to express your thoughts. After a while, you’ll start to see a pattern where you're writing or talking is more positive than negative.

Find ways to cope

You’ve faced the issue head-on and now what? Sadness, anger, betrayal, and grief are all dealt with in their own ways and there's simply no right answer for how you might cope. People find confiding in others an extremely helpful tool of coping whether this is venting and letting out your thoughts to someone. Others might find that just spending more time around friends and family can take their minds off their own thoughts. Find a new hobby or activity that you want to try or work on skills you already know. Cope by creating art, food, and expressing your creativity in that way. You may find that exercise helps you forget about life for a little while, and you cope by adding more of it into your daily routine.

There is no right strategy to cope, everybody handles life's challenges extremely differently. One person's solution may not work for someone else, only you can determine what helps you cope.

Let it go

You’ve come this far and have achieved so much, you know you want to get rid of those awful negative emotions holding you back, and you're nearly there. It’s now time to let go. Let go of everything you’ve been scared of and let go of everything that leads you to feel this way. There's no denying that it’ll be hard, but it’s something you need to do in order for time to heal. You’ll know when you're ready to let go and accept the path you're on. Let go of all the negative emotions you’ve been struggling with and accept a fresh start and look at life.

What can stop time from healing emotional wounds?

  • Holding grudges, you cannot move on if you're stuck holding onto grudges that do not benefit you in any way shape or form.

  • Still being focused on the negativity

After all this time and effort you spent working towards getting rid of all that pain. It would become all for nothing if you are still focused on it. Healing is not linear and this doesn’t mean that if you have the occasional emotion come back you’ll mess up your emotional progress. It means if you remain fixated on the past you’ll never move forward.

  • Not allowing yourself to “forgive and forget”

Forgive yourself or the person/people who caused the pain. Allowing yourself to do this makes the process of healing easier.

  • Looking back

If you reminisce about a breakup or a loved one it can easily bring back those emotions and memories as well as the pain you worked so hard to control and get rid of.

  • Living in the past

You have to get out of that mindset of living in the past, the constant reminder of memories can only bring up bad emotions and negativity. Nothing can change the past

Time can only be a bandage to our emotional wounds, and we can only try our best to make the pain go away. The truth of the matter is that we cannot change the speed of time like we cannot change the speed of a physical injury's healing. So does time heal all? The real answer is both yes and no. You’ll never be able to fully get rid of the emotional harm, but time can make it less painful. As each day goes on, it’ll become easier to forget.

Mia Bennett
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Mia Bennett is a high school student in Auckland, New Zealand. Striving to work as a Journalist in her life she is passionate about beauty, fashion, wellness and keeping up with the latest celebrity news.