"Become distinct." In a letter to her friend Vivi Crespi, Jacqueline Bouvier offered these words of advice.

In the following years, Jackie would become Mrs. Kennedy, thrusting her into the public eye where image-making is crucial. Before being under the limelight, her father, John "Black Jack" Bouvier, had encouraged her to have a unique style and speak in a distinct, breathy voice. These lessons had a profound impact on Jackie and served as the base for the creation of her style which would define a period in American history, and be replicated by women for decades.

For people who aren’t in the public eye, having a distinct style might seem like it holds less meaning. But as writer Joan Didion argued, how you present yourself is a reflection of your self respect. If you take the time to wear something nice and put effort into yourself, it shows that you love yourself and want to be respected. Regardless, having your own style isn’t just limited to your fashion choices– it’s also about exploring hobbies, finding new passions and being confident in who you are.

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Finding Your Style

The first step is to learn beyond school. This means remaining curious and learning more about all sorts of things like art and history and music. Continuing to learn means finding new hobbies and interests, and not only can this affect your style, but it can also give you more things to spend your time doing.

Our interests can be reflected in what we wear, and a great example of this is Lana Del Rey. Growing up she paid little attention to fashion but over time her love for 50's and 60's Americana got her to cultivate her now iconic style. Her Priscilla Presley-inspired bouffant and winged eyeliner are both odes to old Hollywood and her love for singers like Frank Sinatra and Elvis.

A good tool for finding styles you like is Pinterest. Pinterest boards are a great way to stay organized, find inspiration and discover new styles. In your boards look for similarities like pieces that stand out (ex. mini skirts, flared jeans) and you’ll get a better understanding of what you like.

When you’re getting into your style you’re going to need to experiment before you come up with something you like. Try new things and have fun! Eventually you’ll find something you like that makes you feel confident. With time and experimentation find your signatures– perfume, jewelry, clothing items, music, etc.

Image Credit: U.S. National Archives and Records Administration via Wikimedia

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Embracing Authenticity

In 2012, Lana Del Rey stated in an interview with MySpace that her advice to fans was to “Find someone who has a life that you want and figure out how they got it. Read books, pick your role models wisely. Find out what they did and do it.”

Your style doesn’t just mean having a signature perfume or jewelry item–it’s about finding new passions, broadening your horizons and embracing who you are. Surround yourself with things you love, stay curious and carry yourself with self-respect and confidence.

It can be hard to be authentic and in Jackie Kennedy’s case, she struggled for many years to feel secure in who she was. When she was growing up, she was taught to be ashamed of curiosity and to focus more on conforming to high society’s expectations for a woman to prioritize marriage. She hid her love for history and on tests she’d sometimes intentionally get a few questions wrong as to not look too smart. It wasn’t until a trip to Paris that she embraced her love for learning and went on to pursue a journalism career, writing for the Washington Times Herald.

When her husband was running for President, her authenticity was challenged again, with members of his campaign feeling that her modern hair and love for designer clothing was unlike any previous First Lady, and that it could alienate potential voters from the Kennedys. But Jackie continued to do what she’d always loved and her style went on to become iconic– cementing her husband’s presidential legacy as one of glamour and elegance.

Image Credit: Robert Knudsen via Wikimedia

The idea of being distinct goes beyond how you style your hair or what signature jewelry you adorn– it’s a way of enriching your life with new hobbies and being confident in who you are. It’s not something that should be done for attention, but for something that should be done for better self reflection. As many iconic women have proven, how we style ourselves isn’t skin-deep-selfishness, it holds importance as to who we are and how we’re perceived.