I assume you've probably gotten a bad grade once or twice, or said something stupid or inaccurate. Perhaps this didn't end well for you. Perhaps people remembered it. Maybe they even taunted you for it.
What if I took one incident, or one aspect of your life, and made it your whole personality. What if I made sure it was the first thing anybody knew about you. What if I even used it to discredit you, even when something isn't your fault? Better yet, how about I categorize you, lump you in with all the other "Mistake Makers," and make sure to mention it before mentioning anything else about you, or use it as a warning to stay away.
Picture this, except this isn't even a mistake. This isn't something you've done. This is something that's been done to you, by God or by a person, that you have had to live with the consequences of for the rest of your life.
And rather than extending compassion, they stay away from you. They use it against you. Why? Because they have the privilege of not understanding your pain, they have power over you through age and situation, and don't want to use that power to accommodate your needs.
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The phrase "troubled teen" completely disregards the intense pain, trauma, and abuse these teens have gone through to make them the way they are. Rather than framing it as an event or a violation towards the person, it characterizes trauma as a trait, a manifestation of the victim's own character.
Furthermore, this is an incredibly broad over-generalization and oversimplification of the traumatized/mentally ill experience. Contrary to popular belief, trauma is not as simple as be abused, become the abuser. While this is a fun, emotional trope to show on-screen, and very convenient for adults who want to look the other way and justify their lack of compassion, it is an incredibly shallow, surface level understanding of the dynamics of trauma and victimhood. Moreover, it betrays a shocking lack of empathy for people who are, without mincing words, child victims.
Yes, child. As an adult, it is your responsibility, as a person of power and of ability, to accept that you are in a higher position than teenagers, that your actions cannot be held to the standards of an adolescent. In other words, adults cannot stoop to the level of teenagers, let alone teenagers who are disabled emotionally and/or mentally.
Wildly inaccurate, the only thing this umbrella term is able to definitely label is behavior that does not align with (your view of) the norm. Any behavior that may seem unusual or overly emotional can be attributing to the "characteristic" of being troubled. This is the perfect formula for being discredited.
After all, if a troubled child is angry for the way they are treated, they're just acting out. If a troubled child voices concern, or expresses emotion, it is not heard.
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To quote Taylor Swift: Every time you call us crazy we get more crazy." It's an unbeatable situation. You have gone through something unthinkable, and been called crazy for speaking out. When/if you are believed, you are called crazy for surviving.
And if you don't somehow "overcome" (hide) your disability, you are troubled and not believed, and that makes you act worse. It's a never ending cycle. Then, it's a shame you turned out the way you did. Nobody bothers to extend compassion.
As for those that have become masters at hiding it, it doesn't end better for them. They still don't receive help. They know better than to use their voice. They know better than to speak up for themselves.
There is a simple solution. Compassion. Compassion, in the truest sense, doesn't require conditions.
It doesn't require you to be the perfect victim. It doesn't require anything on the victim's part, no kindness, no forgiveness, no gratefulness. Why? Because they're not on trial here. Your job, to the best of your ability, is to show kindness, regardless of whether or not someone deserves it.
