Gossip Girl, perhaps the most iconic TV show in the period of iconic TV shows. Full of glitz and glamour, refined fashion, gorgeous teenage girls and a LOT of scandals, it seems like exactly the kind of show I would love. Right? Well, this is the one show I really can't figure out, so let's dive in to my takeaways.

1. Serena Van Der Woodsen

When I first watched this show, I was stunned to see how many people hate Serena Van Der Woodsen, one of my favorite characters to ever exist in TV show history. And in my opinion, only some of this is rooted in misogyny. The real people to blame are the writers.

In season one we were introduced to this sweet, complicated girl, one who drew us in immediately. A girl who's made mistake after mistake, a girl with everything we could ever want, yet a girl whose life is more complicated than we could ever imagine. Charismatic, beautiful, and charmingly sweet, she drew us in because she is everything we wish we could be, and everything we could never have.

Her past is referred to in echos and flashbacks, a life of drugs, of spending, of terrible decisions, and we can see the remorse on her face. We can see a girl who, despite having a life where innocence is the one luxury she can't afford, still has it. We root for her because she's a fifteen year old girl in an impossible situation, one who is the only person trying to fix something that was never her responsibility.

But beneath all of this, there's something much more concerning we start to realize about Serena- that she has been a victim of abuse, of neglect- that she is the way she is because she grew up faster than she knew how to. The show makes many alludes to her being assaulted, groomed, and being spiked with roofies, and it becomes clear extremely quickly that for all of Serena's confidence, for all of her IT girl charm, that she's never viewed herself as anything more than an object, a shiny trophy to be loved and possessed. Her neglectful, borderline deadbeat mother, who has put husband over husband before her every day of her life, who treated her daughter as nothing more than an advertisement for her perfect life, taught her lessons about love and admiration that she never truly managed to unlearn.

And her little brother, driven to the point of su-c-de attempts from loneliness, is the only person she ever truly managed to care about, past surface charm and politeness. In fact, in the notorious pilot episode in which Chuck attempts to SA Serena, the saddest part is just the lack of shock on her face. She doesn’t even seem surprised.

Serena’s Potential

Serena had real, glowing potential, and in the first few seasons it really did seem like her story was going to be how she changed, how she faced her past mistakes, how she found a way to come to terms with her old life. Her life before season one was never meant to be brushed over, but to become a part of her identity and a part of her choices. Serena had feelings, could think about others, could be selfless, because unlike the other characters, she still had the ability to love.

She knew what it was like to be hurt. And even after sleeping with Blair's boyfriend, I still managed to like her more than Blair, because she truly took accountability, changed her life, and was there for Blair through everything. Not to mention that she practically raised her little brother.

How the Writers Failed Us

Of course, the authors abandoned this ridiculously interesting character to focus on Blair's relationship with Chuck (not even doing this well), leaving us to pretty much forget what Serena went through, or anything to do with her life. She became reduced to a plot device, sleeping with guy after guy, and creating problems for Blair to solve. By the time season 4 came around, we no longer cared what she did, because we forgot she had any personality at all, aside from being Blair's best friend.

There was never any exploration of why she felt so desperate to be loved, yet believed she was alone, like there was in the earlier seasons. There was never any exploration of her attachment issues, of her abandonment. Even when she was sent to a mental hospital! Putting Serena in therapy would have been the perfect way to get us to understand her character, rather than reducing her to the stupid pretty girl who's obsessed with boys. The one therapy scene we did get was heart-wrenching, as we watched Serena describe her teacher as "a pretty great guy," for not r--ping her, despite having every opportunity. And Blake, no longer caring about her role any longer, went from being the best actor on the show by a landslide to one of the weakest.

Serena, if I'm being honest, I expected her to leave the Upper East Side. I wanted her to work in charity, or in mental health, following her brother's attempt to kill himself. She was too much of a free spirit to truly belong there, and she could have had so much character development if she actually searched for who she was, instead of being cast aside as a dropout so Blair could take the stage.

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2. Serena x Dan

In season one, Serena and Dan were the kind of adorable that just melted my heart. Serena's banter was hilarious, and Dan's romantic side was one of the sweetest things I've ever seen. Serena needed to learn to trust again after everything she'd been through, and watching her slowly develop this ability to trust.

Of course, past season two the writers ran out of ideas, and resorted to having them fight, sleep around, and break up so many times I lost any interest in their relationship. The problem with having a main character's arc revolve around learning to trust someone, is that they should truly be trustworthy. And that's not even mentioning the finale. And why, WHY in the world would the show think it was a good idea to make them stepsiblings who share a brother? WHY could this plot point have ever been necessary?

The biggest thing for me is, after the breakup, Serena never stopped loving Dan. She never stopped caring for him, and she did her best to be a good friend to him, even though they weren't together.

And Dan? The second they broke up, he became judgemental and critical of her every move. Everything she did was suddenly grounds for attack, and now that he was no longer getting what he wanted from her, he no longer treated her with respect. That in itself is enough to make me angry and tired.

3. The Later Seasons

I've already made my feelings about season three and on pretty clear, but I'm just going to reiterate myself: they are NOT the same show. You can't make every single person on a show utterly despicable, impossible to root for, and expect anyone to still enjoy it. Making Serena a villian without humanizing Blair was a terrible decision.

In fact, while the earlier two seasons were a drama, with a plot, character arcs, and conflicts, season three and onward were more like a cheesy soap opera about the s-x lives of teenagers. The plot made zero sense and was filled with more plot holes than plots, and it could not have been more clear that nothing in this show was planned. I mean, there's only so many secret impersonaters, dead people coming back to life, false identities, and fake parents a show can have. They ACTUALLY redid the exact same plot device many times- I mean, 3 fake relatives? Really? They introduced random character after random character, never giving them any kind of personality and scrapping them after a couple episodes. There was truly no plot apart from the romances, and no romances to root for. And the fact that EVERY. SINGLE. CHARACTER. Has slept with. EVERY. SINGLE. OTHER. CHARACTER. really ruined this whole thing for me. Let's be honest, no friend group would be able to get past that.

In fact, let me expand on that point.

The Relationships

First, let me show you exactly what I'm talking about, when I say this turned into a really bad soap opera. Here are all the relationships in the show involving multiple main characters (if I talked about the side characters they've dated this list will never end.)

• Dan dated Serena
• Dan dated Vanessa
• Dan dated Blair
• Nate dated Serena
• Nate dated Vanessa
• Nate dated Jenny
• Nate dated Blair
• Chuck dated Blair
• Chuck slept with Jenny
• Chuck had a thing for Serena

Now, 99% of these ships didn't work. Like, they made no sense, felt like an act of boredom, not attraction, and I could physically feel the actors straining to try and make this make sense. That is, the ones that didn't mentally check out, much sooner. So why don't I try and review this show's relationships.

• Dan x Serena: 8.5/10. Sweet, cute, until the writers screwed it up big time. Still a fairly compelling relationship.
• Blair x Chuck: 9/10. Ed's acting was INSANE. That said, having Chuck do things like attempt to punch her, sell her, and (seemingly) try to rape her was writing as it's absolute worst. Nobody but Leighton and Ed could have saved this story, and I was bursting with joy when they got married (which says something because I do NOT like Blair.)
• Nate x Serena: 9/10. They seriously could have been something if Serena had just grown up and acted like an adult instead of clinging to her high school drama routine.
• Dan x Blair: TBH I didn't really see it, if only because Blair's attitude towards him earlier turned me off. She was obviously still pining for Chuck.
• Dan x Vanessa: 5/10. this really felt like the writers had run out of ideas. They were good friends, and had a nice relationship, but they had literal NEGATIVE chemistry.
• Nate x Vanessa: 4/10. I think this helped Vanessa's character development, but it should have ended after an episode or two. Heck, it should have just been a friendship. The only significance of this relationship is Vanessa learning that someone being seemingly rich and perfect doesn't mean they are.
• Nate x Jenny: 4.5/10. I got major little sister vibes from Jenny, and even though the actual age gap isn't that big, Nate looks way older than her.. so it just felt wrong.
• Nate x Blair: 7.5/10. I think this was a really important first love and was huge for Blair's character, and it helped her understand that just because she loved someone and the life they offered her at one point, doesn't mean she cannot change. Nate gave her a choice: a life of safety or a life of self-discovery and Blair needed to be given this choice. Blair said it best: he was her high school love.
• Chuck x Jenny: 2/10. I'm probably the only person who didn't see THIS specific scene as wrong or immoral, given that Chuck was every bit as vulnerable as Jenny at this period and time, and it was a 2 year age gap. That said, it definitely traumatized her, and was the absolute last way anyone would want to lose their virginity.
• I'm not going to touch on Chuck x Serena because that is wrong on so many levels, including harassment, borderline [censored], and the whole he's in love with her best friend type stuff.
• BONUS: Chuck x Eva: 10/10. No explanation necessary.

And let me just say, right now, that the finale was so stupid, so nonsensical, so obviously a desperate attempt at views, that I refuse to even acknowledge that ending. Dan being gossip girl was physically impossible, and ruined about 6 seasons of character development. The idea of an outsider desperately wanting in made perfect sense and was actually a really good idea, but it was just so impossible by that point, made so little sense, that the show no longer meant anything. And everyone's reaction was so rushed, so out of character, I don't even consider it canon.

4. The Characters

Blair Waldorf

Blair Waldorf is one of those characters you love to watch in the early seasons. Gorgeous, and phenomenally played by Leighton, even when her behavior seems beyond despicable, you can't help but care for her. Intelligent, beautiful, social, and incredibly ambitious, the one thing to know about Blair is she would stop at nothing to get ahead, and doesn't care who or what she destroys in order to get there.

The problem is that Blair's insecurity wasn't just a character trait: it bordered on pathetic. The idea that anybody who succeeded at ANYTHING- whether it be a party invitation, a good grade, an opportunity, had to deal with one of Blair's tantrums, got really exhausting after a while. The main issue with Blair is that she lacked any sort of skin, any sort of backbone whatsoever, and that's not a trait you want to give the "badass, perfect," character.

Blair lacked the traits that her sort of character needed in order to be rooted for: a sympathetic backstory, street smarts, the ability to win. The idea that someone so incredibly privileged, someone with closets and closets full of designers, the sweetest nanny in the whole world, who was adored and waited on by every single person, could wholeheartedly convince themselves that they were the victim of some terrible plot against them, was hard to watch. And her terrible jealousy of Serena was out of hand, and let her to say and do things to Serena that would end any friendship I ever had in an instant. I mean really, who wants to be friends with someone that will use your darkest secrets and memories against you for a party invitation, who can turn on you so quickly you get whiplash? And for the majority of the seasons, we really didn't see any evidence of her having a work ethic, she was just more competitive than the rest of the cast. Her eating disorder and mommy issues were not deeply explored (once again, the writers demonstrating their inability to write actual character arcs and emotion) and it was really tiring hearing this excuse for six seasons, while her best friend battled drug addiction and her nanny, father, many friends, and stepfather all did nothing but dote on her, praise her, and love her. And that's not even bearing in mind that Blair was absolutely terrible at revenge. Let's be honest, she would have accomplished NOTHING that she's celebrated for if it weren't for her privilege. She had groups of friends work for free when she got an internship, she paid her way into NYU, and every opportunity she ever got is something she bought her way into. Even her revenge schemes weren't a result of her cunning but her ability to whine her way into people doing things for her- and it rarely even worked. And the slu- shaming her best friend? That in itself made me angry enough to hate her.

Blair herself acknowledges that her not getting into Yale was just karma. After sabotaging all of her friends for years to get ahead, after starting (what she believed to be) a false rumor that could have ended her teacher's career for (gasp) giving her a B, after spending her time in scheme after scheme instead of just working hard, Blair 100% earned that rejection, and the fact that she could buy her way into another top school after what she did is just more proof that Blair isn't unlucky, she just thinks everyone but her is unworthy. And while people often point out that "at least Blair is aware she's a b--tch", the fact is that she really isn't.

She still clings to the narrative that everything she does is because life has been unfair to her, clings to the idea that she's the victim rightfully taking back what's hers. But just because she wanted something doesn't mean it belonged to her, and after 6 seasons it would have done her right to realize that.

The fandom tends to adore Blair, and I will admit, I do see her redeeming qualities. She is an absolutely wonderful girlfriend to Chuck, is beautiful, and her ambition is contagious. And, once she finally worked out her jealousy issues, she did manage to be a good friend to Serena. Most importantly, Leighton is an absolutely incredible actress, and could make us root for a serial killer if she wanted to.

Her best scenes? Anything to do with Chuck.

"Three words. Eight letters. Say it and I'm yours."

Jenny Humphrey

(Alexa, play Motion Sickness by Phobe Bridgers.)

Jenny is probably the most realistic character in this whole show. She makes me think of Carmen by Lana Del Rey, in the fact that in all honesty, she was just exposed to pain she couldn't handle at a very young age, and tried to keep up with a world that was never made for her.

Making stupid decision after stupid decision, Jenny to me was more confused than anything else, and her actress played her innocence despite her actions so convincingly that I never managed to feel anything but bad for her. Jenny never wanted to hurt someone, though she often did, and the scene after she sleeps with Chuck was acted so well that I found myself on her side.

But, much more importantly, the reason I love Jenny is just how saavy she is, how intelligent. I mean, how often do fourteen year olds struggling with money single handedly take down the queen bee, create their own fashion line, become an important designer, and find a way to somehow bounce back from every setback about a thousand times? Jenny was the only one who was a match for Blair, despite being much younger than her, and funnily enough the only one who could really stand up for herself. I knew I liked her from the beginning, when she found a way to lock her attempted rapist on the roof in his underwear as a freshman, and that love only grew as challenge after challenge, she found a way to bounce back (and take whoever she wanted down with her). Plus, her fashion sense is ELITE! I LOVE the dark lips and the grunge aesthetic.

Eva

To be honest, I think she and Chuck could have been endgame. She was the kind of pure, angelic person that could capture anyone’s hearts, and her few lines left a real impression, almost restored my belief in humanity (which this show, at this point, was starting to ruin).

Rufus Humphry

The father of Jenny and Dan was probably the most likable character in this whole show (besides Eric). Unconditionally loving, doting, and funny, he was the kind of father anybody would want, and some of the scenes involving Jenny made me feel terrible for him. He is a caring and moral person who never stoops to others level, admits his mistakes, and genuinely does everything he could ever do for his children. That said, his love story with Lily was not it- he deserved someone better.

Lily Van Der Woodsen

I could never bring myself to like Lily. While she most definitely did change and try to be a better mother once the show began, I could never get past the fact that she never showed true remorse for the horror she put her children through earlier. I mean, leaving her YOUNG kids with a friend while she ran off with a crack addict?

Getting divorced 5 times and using her kids as pawns to get men to like her? Treating her kids like publicity stunts rather than human beings? Lily's pride was her downfall, and while I could be sympathetic to her at times, the fact that she refused to admit any wrongdoing when it came to her kids infuriated me. And by the time she FALSELY PUT A MAN IN PRISON FOR RAPE for no other reason than to make sure her daughter wasn't on the news for a scandal was ridiculous. And the fact that she refused to acknowledge that putting a man in prison for a crime he didn't commit was wrong because "I did it for my daughter"??

Lily could not have cared less how many times Serena was taken advantage of- what she cared about was keeping her name out of a scandal. Especially considering how much guilt Serena went through? While I have no love for Ben whatsoever, Lily deserved to go to prison for what she did to him.

Interestingly enough, despite not doing much for her own children, she was an incredible stepmother to Chuck, and perhaps his saving grace- her redeeming quality.

Vanessa

Vanessa is ridiculously overhated. First off, she is so beyond gorgeous that she's hard to dislike, no matter what she did. Second off, she was not that self-rightous.

While her judgementalness was annoying as the show began, she sincerely apologized immediately, and let's be honest, who wouldn't judge this group of people? Vanessa was a person who did the right thing for those she cared about, as shown when she offered to be Milo's mother as a literal teenager, despite the fact that Milo wasn't even her kid. Vanessa definitely did screw up. But next to everyone else in the cast? She's a SAINT.

Chuck Bass

Chuck Bass was HANDS DOWN the most well written character on the show, the most complicated, the darkest, and the most controversial. A serial attempted rapist and drug obsessed teenager, I'd be lying if I didn't say that by the end of season one, I wanted to drag him to the stake myself. But instead, the show takes a different turn, and Bass ends up being the writer's one redeeming quality.

The fact is that Bass wasn't meant to be the good guy, nor was he meant to be redeemed, but rather, he makes us face a much harder question: what creates a monster? What IS a monster? Nobody but Ed could have pulled this role off, created a character who we feel for so deeply, a character whose belief that he killed his mother makes us ache too, who we despise yet want to see win, to create a character who makes us truly understand that monsters are created, not born. The scene where he tries to throw himself off the roof, his reactions to his father's death, opened all of our eyes, and we could actually feel his love for Blair, his heartache, through the screen. Bass wasn't given a redemption arc. He was given character growth. He was given an opportunity to be a man that his father never was, and by the end of the show, while I couldn't like him (he'd have to do a lot more work for that), I could understand him. I could forgive him. I could want him to live a good life, I could want him to break the cycle of abuse.

His best moments? Anything to do with Lily or Blair (usually, at least.)

Eric Van Der Woodsen

Alright, now that's an easy one. This guy is a total sweetheart, and the only person in the whole show who constantly thought about other people.

"Now, how did you get to be so wise?"

"The nanny."

Yeah. Eric was a wonderful friend to Jenny, a wonderful sister, and the only person on this entire show that it seems completely impossible to hate. Despite having been overlooked and neglected his whole life, he has nothing but compassion and forgiveness for the people around him, and more than anything else, he's just lonely.

He's just desperate for a friend, a boyfriend, anyone. His mental health issues were wonderfully portrayed, and more than anything else, his ability to forgive his parents, take Rufus in with open arms, and play the parent, the caregiver, to everyone, despite needing one himself, made him the only person in this show that remained the hero.

Special Mention: Dorota

The sweetheart nanny of Blair, she was absolutely adorable and SO funny. I mean, she raised Blair like a daughter, and I would actually kill to have a mom like her. She was so selfless and put up with all of Blair's childish nonsense with pleasure, because she loved that girl more than her mother did. Plus with her big eyes, dramatic expressions, and the childish joy she took from Blair's happiness, who couldn't love her?

I love Cyrus too!! (I don't have enough information on him to write a paragraph, but that actor could nail any role with his quirkiness, cheesy humor, and altruistic, loving nature.)

Worst Characters

This show has a lot of despicable people, but these take the cake.

- Agnes. DRUGGING a child FOR THE PURPOSE of having men gang rape her because gasp she didn't want to be your business partner is a kind of evil I cannot forgive.

- Catherine. A disgusting, slimy predator, Catherine blackmailing a teenager into being her sidepiece- and showing no shame whatsoever- infuriated me.

- Jack Bass. An attempted SAer who showed no remorse. Need I say more?

Overall, this was an entertaining show through and through, though it's actual writing quality was debatable depending on the season. If nothing else, I would recommend this show purely for the outfits, and for the comfort of knowing that no matter how bad your decisions are, someone on this show has made worse.