A man in a dress, no big deal, right? Not so much.
Since the era of Prince and David Bowie, the genres of glam rock, punk and new wave, all the way to the genre of K-Pop, men have been dressing in things they feel comfortable in; whether it be dresses and skirts, or trousers. So why is it, when Harry Styles (a cisgender man) does it, social media is in uproar? Today we're going to discuss gender norms, and why Harry Styles was heavily criticized, but also praised.
What's The Big Deal?
You may be thinking, why can't we let people dress however they want to? And you're correct. We need to learn to stay out of people's business.
Let the man live. All he did was wear a piece of fabric, but was attacked with countless hate comments by faceless social media accounts. The thing is, when something as trivial as this is met with such an excessive amount of backlash, we wonder what our society has been reduced to.
The lack of acceptance is astounding, and so is the blatant invalidation of many people. Clothes do not come labeled with genders, and so “manly” or “womanly” is not explicitly defined, because there are so many people that do not identify with them, or dress like them. Gender is a social construct, and forcing opinions of gender normatively just isn't it.
The Backlash
On the 13th of November, Vogue Magazine announced their November issue's cover would be Harry Styles, looking absolutely dashing, in a gown and tuxedo combo. The singer would make history as the first male on the cover of Vogue magazine, and the internet was evidently... affected. One end was in complete uproar and denial, and Styles was met with backlash, targeted at his so-called loss of masculinity and feminization. One notable comment was that of Candace Owens, an American author.
There is no society that can survive without strong men. The East knows this. In the west, the steady feminization of our men at the same time that Marxism is being taught to our children is not a coincidence.
It is an outright attack. Bring back manly men. https://t.co/sY4IJF7VkK
— Candace Owens (@RealCandaceO) November 14, 2020
Now, the issue with this comment is that it is truly calling back to the days of toxic masculinity. With gender norms and roles blurring, masculinity does not make a man, and dresses do not make anyone less of a man. It is sad to note that Owens is not the only one that shares that view.
When children draw their stick like figure in school, they put the dress on a female. Who do the put the dress on now, & who represents whose female or male? Imagine the confusion going on in their minds.
— Speakup20 (@tuscansun60) November 17, 2020
The illusion that men must be manly and strong to be taken seriously is a dangerous one, that poisons the worldview of impressionable teenagers. The fact of the matter is, wear what you want to, nobody has the right to tell you that you look less of a man because of it. The good news is, Harry Styles refuses to take that to heart, and continues to break gender stereotypes.
Supportive Comments and an Accepting Society
Styles was met by supportive comments by celebrities, fans, and the public for being his true self. Some include:
Jameela Jamil, British actress:
Harry Styles is plenty manly, because manly is whatever you want it to be, not what some insecure, toxic, woman-hating, homophobic dickheads decided it was hundreds of years ago. He’s 104% perfect. ๐ค๐ฝ
— Jameela Jamil ๐ (@jameelajamil) November 16, 2020
Zach Braff, American actor:
Our whole lives boys and men are told we need to be manly. Life is short. Be whatever the [censored] you want to be. pic.twitter.com/oY6ji3tpaI
— Zach Braff (@zachbraff) November 16, 2020
Even Twitter music got involved,
We don't know who needs to hear this but Harry Styles looks amazing in a dress.
— Twitter Music is watching the AMAs (@TwitterMusic) November 16, 2020
(And it's the truth, he looks absolutely stunning, end of story).
From these words, we can garner that it is the minority that deems dressing in such a way as “emasculating”. Breaking gender stereotypes should be praised, since it signifies that individuals are not afraid to be themselves, and are comfortable in their own body, which is something each of us need to learn. Additionally, they signify a change in societal views.
When David Bowie wore a dress for an album cover in 1970, it was banned in the US. The same idea goes for Elton John, Freddie Mercury etc. The fact that in today's society, countless people are defending Styles and similar-thinking people, means that there is some hope for acceptance. That's not to say we shouldn't praise icons of breaking norms in the music industry; Harry Styles himself admits to being inspired by these icons.
Wider Correlations
The traditional idea that men must be manly and women must be feminine is inherently harmful to today's changing and diverse society. Sure, there are people who are comfortable following those norms, but that's no reason to invalidate other's choices. Let people be who they want to be.
Another issue is that, by assigning clothes a gender, you invalidate non-binary individuals, who actively do not conform to societal expectations of gender identities. Clothes are merely expressions of self-identity, and by preaching that you should not wear clothes that are “supposed to be for the other gender”, you advocate the incessant gendering of things that specifically do not need to be labeled.
You may think, assigning a gender to clothes isn't that harmful. But when you do this, people who don't identify as their birth assigned gender, or people who just want to wear what they feel comfortable in, are invalidated. They are denied the ability to express themselves however they want. By doing so, you make society divisive and un-accepting, which is the opposite of what we really need.
Additionally, the backlash reeks of toxic masculinity, which is defined as adherence to traditional male gender roles that stigmatize and limit the emotions boys and men may comfortably express while elevating other emotions such as anger. There is no fixed concept of "a man" in the traditional sense anymore; everyone can, and should be allowed to express themselves however they want to, without fear of societal judgement or backlash for doing so.
Not Radical, But Close
Even if you don't know much about the legends of old-school pop, you cannot deny their influence on today's celebrities and fashion. As such, their influence is still prevalent in today's societies, and not even just in Western societies, as Candace Owens thinks.
The truth is, the cover wasn't radical, it was just different, and that's one step closer to change.
The Takeaway
Despite the backlash Harry Styles was faced with, teenagers in particular need to know that it's perfectly fine to dress however you want. Clothes themselves have no gender, and it is wrong to tell people that and force gender-normative views on them. Gender boundaries and traditional norms can be broken.
Now that's not to say if you do conform to gender norms you're wrong for doing so. It's actually the complete opposite. The primary message is that it's your choice.
As long as you don't force other people to follow your path, do whatever you want. Don't let society's expectations define you, define yourself.
